24 – Jem
everything’s been becoming messier and more outta hand. i don’t quite know how, or when it started. i swore never to walk this path again. yet i find myself being sucked into this emotional blackhole. i guess its true when people say fun comes at a price. dancing with the enemy aint that dangerous after all, but a slip is all it takes.
2008 seems to be filled with regret and pushing my limits. im still praying for the day that things will change, maybe slow down and let me have the feeling of peace and joy just for once. sometimes fun gets tiring and sick. yeah i might have ADD, or the fact that im quite the thrill seeker, but somewhere inside i tend to push myself so far off away from this entire world that no one quite understand the magnitude of things that just seem to sweep by.
if “all the world’s a stage, and men merely its players”, then it makes us all pretty good actors and actresses aint it? cuz it’ll be impossible to not have any drama in your life. oh well. all i can do is pray and hope that desire in me to flee this barren land will one day take action. literally or other wise.
i hate to sit and stare at my phone
hate to feel as if ive hit a brick wall
i hate to stare into blank space
and force my thoughts on something else
i hate to feel this restriction
as if a pair of hands were literally choking me
i hate how i cant control all this shit
all i wanna do is break free.
This is the way you left me,
I’m not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it’s forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
i wish you were here – incubus
im amazed at how my body can still function after close to no sleep after a crazy night at zouk. met up with shinyeong and liang on fri and managed to catch American Gangster. i like the show! cool show. like the way they film both sides of the story in parallel.
im pretty pleased with all the movies i’ve caught! 27 Dresses the week before, then The Darjeeling Limited and now American Gangster. awesome! hopefully The Atonement tmr will be good too! The Darjeeling Limited has one of the best cinematics and photography ive seen. every frame seems like a perfect picture. intense hues and saturated colors. plus the gorgeous colourful setting in India. Perfect.
back to the weekend. it’s been a pretty crazy week. zouk on wed with serene and nicole. and we met elizabeth there who was CRAZY! i love you girl. ure crazily fun to party with. one true party chic! poor leslie had such a hard time playing Steve Irwin trying to fight off all the crocs! i dont understand why some guys can get so desperate. and so mysterious cap guy ended up next to us, and boy can he dance! unfortunately aint that attractive up close.
i crashed the whole day on thursday. got pretty upset cuz i wasnt allowed to go to the SK-II event with a really dumb excuse. oh well. dragged my ass home and totally knocked out till the next morning.
friday! corporate lunch with the team was nice. we had it at S’pore Cricket Club at the restaurant upstairs. i never knew it was such a chi chi attas place. there was very strict dress code. no jeans at all. and no handphones allowed. wow. the food was delicious! i had the lamb rack with caesar for starters. its nice to dine in a proper restaurant with proper silverware and excellent service. i could get use to the life. haha..i wish. dessert was just superb! chocolate croquette with espresso ice cream and masala mascapone cream. if only it wasnt that exculsive a club i’d return for lunch again. i think it’s only for club members and the VP was one. so after the movie it was supper at Spize. and a very very last min decision to head down to zouk with elizabeth. met a couple of new guys who were from the fight club. some muay thai group which is pretty cool! fun fun!
and so finally it’s another saturday at the beach with my so called sis nicole! and mr sun had to so trick us and not come out! damn it! so it was a pretty useless trip down. lunch at coffee club where the girl decided to break out cam whoring the whole entire time! omg. girl, what am i gonna do with TONS of your photos in my com?! haha.. we bought pretty undies from top shop and won ourselves some spa facial treatment! so rushed down to do it since we were bored. was my first time going for facial. quite scary cuz you have no idea what they’re gonna do to your face!! and i was so tired i fell asleep! haha..
went back to bake cup cakes and it was off to zouk! sat night was pretty crazy! met more new people, and hung out with the muay thai guys. with tons of drinks and lots of FUN! sambuca drank and inhaled was crazily good. love it when it sorta just hits your head. just wow. and its another crazy weekend gone by so so quickly!
coffee club, nicole, myself and the very yummy garlic prawn pasta!
baby, it’s a fact – hellogoodbye
girl i’m already miss you!
last time hitting the beach with my beach babe before she flies back to the US!! it was pretty crazy. and the sun was absolutely wonderful! and it’s super crazy that we actually had to use the map to find our way around! for some very strange reason the beach was packed with guys. like all sorts. and we had quite alot of fun laughing at how some guys act all macho and stuff. it’s hilarious! oooh yes.. and the hot, unshaven looking Caucasian dude! eye candy!
i’m lovin’ it!
lunch at Coastes. the pizza was pretty good! it’s nice just sitting by the beach and watching the world go by.
on our little adventure round the island! picking pretty flowers, statues, self-proclaimed villas and even a couple getting married on the bridge!! the bridge was scary as hell! i was so scared my phone and stuff were gonna fall into the sea!
and finally some pics before we headed off to town
had alot of fun trotting around the island!
accidental babies – damien rice
i came across this poem by W.H Auden during work in a new publication, L’Officiel. it’s lovely! plain, simple, yet it says so much.
Looking up at the stars, I know quite well
That, for all they care, I can go to hell,
But on earth indifference is the least
We have to dread from man or beast.
How should we like it were stars to burn
With a passion for us we could not return?
If equal affection cannot be,
Let the more loving one be me.
Admirer as I think I am
Of stars that do not give a damn,
I cannot, now I see them, say
I missed one terribly all day.
Were all stars to disappear or die,
I should learn to look at an empty sky
And feel its total dark sublime,
Though this might take me a little time.
The more loving one – W.H. Auden